Schaffer paragraphs

Schaffer Paragraph 2:1 ratio of Commentary to Concrete Detail

1)    Topic Sentence (TS) - state main point of paragraph

2)    Concrete Detail (CD) - "the what" > shows what is happening - by using: facts, examples, evidence, support, paraphrases, quotes, summary

3)    Commentary (CM) - Analysis, interpretation, opinions, inference, insight - explains how detail proves point .... USE TRANSITIONAL WORDS/PHRASES!

4)    Concluding Sentence (CS) - "Therefore, As a result,"

Cinderella lives a miserable life. For example, she does all the cooking, cleaning, and sewing. This shows that she is taken advantage of by her selfish stepmother and stepsisters. This is important because her horrible life gives her a present, her fairy godmother. As a result, she becomes a princess.

Global warming is a world problem and needs to be stopped. If it is not stopped, statistics show that the world will be drastically hurt. Global warming should be mankind's greatest worry. This is because the Earth can become negatively and drastically affected worldwide. Therefore, global warming is a top priority and cannot be ignored.

If you think about it, the Schaffer Paragraph is very similar to an ACES approach.

Address prompt
Cite evidence
Explain yourself
Summarize

Some transitional phrases/words:
This (also) shows that
This is (important) because
In addition
Furthermore
Therefore
For example

Schaffer Rules

·         Must not be written in first person

·         Every paragraph must be at least five sentences long; however, there can be more as long as the same ratio of two CMs to every CD is kept

·         Each section (TS, CD, CM, CS) is generally one sentence in length

·         Each section should also avoid past tense and only be written in present tense

Some of McGill's guidelines for better writing

Remove passive voice - is, am, are, was, were, be, being, been < Replace with active verbs

Vary sentence lengths <<< this is called syntax (the arrangement of words)

Don't use the word very